She hadn’t meant to do it. Not consciously, anyway.
No more than she’d meant to when she’d started walking toward her husband’s funeral pyre, the night they had burned his beheaded remains.
It was as if something was pulling at her from within. Some subconscious undercurrent of feeling—a pain beneath the pain. Twisted like a fishhook in her guts, it lurched, and before she knew it, she was dragged beneath the surface.
The first breath was liquid fire in her lungs. The second, she would never know, because before she could take it, something soft wrapped around her middle and plucked her from the river like a twig. Unceremoniously, it dropped her on the grassy bank. Kagome twisted over onto her side as she hacked up a scorching throatful of water.
Slowly, blearily, she looked up from the booted feet that stood before her, to the crossed arms slashed with red, to the stony face that regarded her more chillingly than ever before. Sesshoumaru’s golden eyes were narrowed and hard. Spilling from his unarmored shoulder, the length of fur that had wrested her from the river gave a disdainful flick, discharging the moisture beaded upon it in a shower of mirrored silver. Regaining a bit of her bearings, Kagome recoiled from him, flushing as she scrambled to cover her nakedness.
“Calm yourself,” Sesshoumaru said, his voice clipped and icy cold. The cruel pierce of his gaze made her stomach clench as it scored witheringly over her. “I see no woman before me.”
Kagome’s cheeks paled as she ducked her head, stricken. “W-why are you so—”
“You know very well why,” he interrupted her ruthlessly. “Even the lowest of creatures wishes to remain alive.”
Kagome’s hands fell from her chest to furl in the grass instead. “But that’s just it…the way I feel.” Desperately she looked up at him as her eyes began to well. “It’s as if a part of me has died. Through the mating mark, our flesh was bonded and now…” She shook her head in hopeless frustration. “…It’s impossible to explain.”
Sesshoumaru was silent for a moment, though Kagome could feel the weight of his eyes trained upon her. “I know.”
Kagome glanced up at him in surprise, knowing he wasn’t ever one to say things out of sympathy. “How…?”
Fluttering above her, the shadow of a towel descending distracted her. Gathering it to her, Kagome frowned up at him in consternation. Then, she realized.
“Your mother,” she said. “You saw what she went through, after your father died.”
Sesshoumaru’s jawline went flintier still. Later, Kagome would understand this to be the closest approximation to an expression of discomfort, coming from him. At the present, it merely distressed her further.
“I’m sorry,” she said hoarsely. “I shouldn’t have. I didn’t really mean to—I just…”
“Spare me your excuses,” Sesshoumaru bit out, though his tone was not quite as sharp as his words, “and do not attempt it again.”
Inuyasha © Rumiko Takahashi
Revised 6/26/23
Reading these side stories made me just realize one thing: Sesshoumaru seems to be the only one constantly by Kagome’s side during her breakdown. I don’t know if it a choice of perspective but it looks like he was the o lying one who knew how to handle her grief and the only one who dared to be rough with her and not allow her to wallow in her sorrow.
This chapter shows that he knew what to expect, but it still makes me wonder where her friends were at that time.
Agreed. They don’t know how to handle this kind of loss. They also expected Kagome to just mourn for a few weeks and move on, because premature death is an integral part of Sango, Miroku, Rin, and Shippo’s lives. They’re all orphans who have seen their parents killed in front of them. They have no sympathy for Kagome. As sad as what happened to Inuyasha was for them, it was also normal. That’s why no one investigated his murder.
A fair question 🙂 Sounds like something to explore in stories to come! 😉
Loved hearing your thoughts on Sesshoumaru’s handling of the situation – thanks for sharing!!
<3 <3
She had no friends they left her all alone only he was by her side.
Of course she is distant to them.
Thanks for sharing your take, Mari!
<3 <3